Dear Answers: I have very strong feelings for my best friend, but he doesn’t see me that way. He definitely treats me differently from other girls and gives me a lot more attention…

How do I bridge the gap between friendship and something more than that?

Dear Wishing for More: Oh, the woes of unrequited love! You say that he doesn’t like you that way, but do you know that for sure?

If you’re correct, then there isn’t anything you can do. It is impossible to make someone like you.

It sounds like you actually aren’t sure about how he feels, so if you really want a chance at romance, you are going to need to talk to him.  The best approach is to start with letting him know how you feel, without coming on so strong that you’re overwhelming.

Perhaps go to a movie, then follow with coffee. You will both be relaxed, and more apt to communicate. Let him know what a great friend he is, and how highly you think of him.

If he still seems receptive, tell him that you are open to taking your relationship to the next level. If he has been crushing on you, he will be relieved to know that you feel the same way.

If he doesn’t share your feelings, things could get awkward for awhile, but the more gentle your approach, the less likely that there will be a negative impact on your friendship.

If he really is your best friend, he’ll probably tell you that he values your friendship, but that he really doesn’t think of you that way, followed by a sock in the arm.  Your honesty will bring you closer, whether it be as friends or as a couple.

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