Spring Break is overrated
March 21, 2017
As spring break approaches, visions of nubile coeds storming sandy beaches, getting drunk off cheap tequila and being involved in questionable social situations come to mind. But are these tawdry dreams and fantasies all they’re cracked up to be?
The closest I ever got to a spring break spent at an exotic location liquored up was probably with my mom in Santa Monica, sneaking vodka cranberries in Ocean Spray bottles onto the beach while my sibling’s boogie boarded the day away.
Most, however, were spent sleeping in until 2 p.m. after staying up all night long running around the neighborhood with my friends. And this was all in high school. By college a week off meant taking on extra hours at work to get that sweet, sweet paycheck with more than 16 part-time hours on it.
The one jet-setting spring break I took to NYC I spent the majority of my time holed up in the Waldorf Astoria reading “The Kite Runner,” and broke out in hives from drinking too much Fernet-Branca at the hotel bar. The first class flight was worth it, though.
My spring break record may not be the most extravagant, but according to the Chicago Tribune more than 50 percent of college students will be taking off to hotspot locations such as Las Vegas, Cancun, Mexico and Punta Cana, Dominican Republic.
Statista.com stated that 27 percent of students will be working while 22 percent will be staying local, just about making up the other 50 percent of spring breakers.
Spring break reminds me of those supplemental holidays like New Year’s Eve, Halloween, or the recently passed St. Patrick’s Day. The pressure to go out in a jovial bang, get wasted and have “fun,” can be all too great. I’d rather not have to get dolled-up, coordinate a costume, or fish out the only green piece of clothing I own just to be a part of the party.
Back in the 1990’s and early 2000’s MTV spent an entire week of air time every year dedicated to showcasing college age students and their willingness to debase themselves on national television. According to Bustle.com, programming included whipped cream bikinis, bumping bodies on “The Grind” and “I’m Spring Broke.” Where who else but Jerry Springer entices Shelly to cover herself in honey and feathers for an undisclosed amount of money. As bustle.com said, “The feathers washed off her body, sure, but did they ever wash off her soul?”
So this spring break I implore you to spend your time off from school how you please. Party hard, work your ass off, sleep the days away, whatever you do, don’t let party envy get the best of you.